May 2003
may 1
I'm at school and I have to use the bathroom really bad so I find one and go in. The bathroom is really small and I have to wait in line. When I get to a stall I realize the doors are really short and you can practically see everyone. I'm putting toilet paper down on the seat because there are no covers but then I decide I really don't want to use that bathroom so I run off to drama class. Only a few people are there and we're waiting for more people. I still have to go to the bathroom. Some girl is there talking about her boyfriend, how he went off to find a really nice bathroom because he was wearing his new leather pants and didn't want to get them dirty (???) I'm at home and think I finally get to use the toilet, but when I flush it (there was still some toilet paper left in it from someone else), it overflows and the water gushes out and onto the floor.
may 4
I'm at home and busy doing something. My dad was using the phone but came to give it to me because some guy was calling me on the other line and said it was very important to talk to me. I take the phone and say "Hello?" There is a lot of static or something and I can barely hear the guy who says "It's Jesus," and a bunch of other weird stuff. Then I recognize the voice and say "Mark?" and he's like "Yeah," so we start talking. I ask him about how work is going and stuff. I'm at Deer Valley and go into my documentary class even though I haven't been in weeks. The teacher and everyone seems glad to see me. I have my camera with me and I'm sitting down in the front row because I want to leave. The teacher starts passing out papers and a lot of people are coming at once so I try to sneak out unnoticed, but he sees and asks me why. I don't answer, just walk out into the hallway. Everyone is at grandma's house having a party. I was doing something ? but stop so I can make Rose and I some ice cream sundaes. I'm supposed to hang out with Maria and it's 11:30 (AM). She's over at my house and I tell her that I still have to take a shower and shave my legs. She watches TV while I do. I'm in my room getting ready and I look at my cell phone. There is this weird game/screensaver on there that flashes all of these words. It's been locked in and I'm trying to fix it when it changes into this little video game. You have to run from this big, flashing hand or it kills you. I try to get it down on the first level but I still keep dying. Rose and I are out and about and decide to stop by the library where I used to work. It is almost closing time but there are a lot of people there, mostly kids. I say hi to my old boss and I notice all of a sudden this really big crowd of kids running off to the back room. I follow them and stop outside this really tiny back room. The kids would hold onto the walls and then let go, and because the floor was so slippery, they would fly outside. I try to get them to stop. There are three kids who end up in this weird tangle (two boys, one girl) who end up in this big tangle and I have to save them. I'm in this class and we're supposed to be making a model of a casino out of these Lego-type things, but to me they look more like houses. Our group isn't really doing it, just talking, so I walk around and look at the ones other groups are making. I go back to my group and one of the girls is looking at this map. We are supposed to decide where we would put it in Brentwood. The girl is angry because we're not getting credit or a grade for the assignment. I'm helping to put together this slideshow project about some girl (?). I see images on a screen and then type in the keywords on a computer, which are sent to a guy in the front of the room, who has the main computer. I'm trying to type everything as fast as I can but I keep messing up on spelling. This girl in the back of the room, who is jumping on a trampoline, tells me I'm trying to do too much. On the screen are images of guys with really big muscles, of people dancing, and other things. The last one was a clip of this animated movie called "Mission", where some characters had to save their friend by following him down this weird water hole into a cave. The girl is still yelling at me and I finally say "When do you realize I'm not going to do what you tell me to do, and never will?"
may 7
Everyone's at grandma's house and we're having a dinner party. I was doing something and no one bothered to tell me dinner was ready so I get in there and practically everyone is eating. I get in line behind my brother and I see some rice so I'm glad, but he takes the last of it. I'm at school hanging out with Rose. There is a concert going on in the cafeteria and I see Mark in the mosh pit. When it ends I go up to him and we sit around talk for awhile. I tell him about how I haven't really been going to school. There is some kind of lunch program for people who don't have the money to pay for food and a bunch of homeless people are there getting something to eat. Mark and I are still talking when I look at the clock and notice it's 2:55 and bowling starts at 3. I run outside, calling Rose on my cell phone. While waiting for someone to pick me up and take me to the bowling alley, I stand outside and talk to Rose on my cell and Maria is there waiting for someone too. It turns into night very fast and I'm still waiting for my mom. There are quite a few people around, and one car pulls up, all parked up on the sidewalk. This guy in the front starts yelling, "What kind of son would make his father come pick him up at night?" (his son was waiting for him). Because of the way that car is parked, a bunch of other cars have to drive up the side of this hill to get around it. One of the cars is a Chevy and this girl starts yelling that she hates them. I'm talking to someone about how badly everyone else is driving and they say "Well, they drive good during the day" and I say something like "Yeah, when it's LIGHT OUT" (??? I think I was trying to be sarcastic but it didn't work) My mom finally picks me up and we drive home a weird way, on these deserted-looking roads through some big fields. All of the grass on the fields is dry and brown. There are a bunch of lights everywhere. My family and I go to some hotel with my family, and when we're walking in I see Maria and Michelle. I talk to Maria for a minute, and for some reason she doesn't want my family to see her. Rose and I go to bowling but we decide we don't want to say so we just run out. This guy who looks kind of like Owen Wilson asks us if we have class or not, and we say there's some weird seminar in the area we usually bowl in. We see the teacher in the parking lot, and he asks us if we're sick. I start making these sounds like I'm going to throw up so he runs off. Rose and I find her sister, and we still want to leave school (the bowling alley is part of the school in my dream). We find one of those bikes that can have up to four people on it (their own seats and pedals). It takes me some difficulty to get on it but I finally do. Rose's sister is in the front seat, no one in the second (I tried to get into it but it was too small or something), I get in the third, and Rose is in the last seat. We keep having to climb down all of these little flights of stairs while still on the bike. Now the school is also connected to the marina and I see a path down by the water that will let us get out. We have to go down some more stairs and across this platform. Something happens on the platform and we all fall off into the water. Rose and I come up right away but we can't find her sister, so Rose searches around underwater while I stay above and look for her.
may 8
I'm at LMC and talking to Debra. We had rented some video about police officers but hadn't watched it and it was a week overdue. She gives it to me so I can take it back to Blockbuster. I say paying won't be a problem because I hardly ever go there and won't have to do it for awhile. We're in the back and this cop comes because something weird has happened. Debra is doing a story for the newspaper and she has him pose in front of a police car (not his) for a picture. My parents pick up me and Rose from school, and I say that we're not going to bowling. They ask me what excuse we're using and I say none. We drive to a place that is a combo fast-food place and store, and only Rose goes in because I don't like the girl who works there. When Rose comes out, my parents and I talk about going through the drive-thru because we're hungry. Rose says that if we want, she can tell the girl to bring us food when her shift is over, and how in high school Rose had the girl bring her a burrito every Monday. I'm with this group of people going to Brenden to see a movie. We have to climb down this weird flight of stairs. There is this bald guy near me and he is really fascinated by my shoes (the red ones). A lot of the other guys look and say they like them, too. We go inside the theatre and then wait in line to go up to a counter and buy tickets. A lot of the people, especially the girls (most of whom are wearing really nice dresses) are cutting in line but I don't. I get stuck in line behind this girl in a blue dress because she's arguing with everyone behind the counter. I don't have my glasses and it is hard for me to see the movie titles and times. There is one movie called "Triad 13" or something like that, and Leelee Sobieski is in it. Another movie is "187." A lot of people are going to see this one scary movie but I think it's stupid so I want to see something else. I think about seeing the "Triad" movie but there is only one showing at 6, and I think that will be too late. I'm talking to the girl in blue and say "Fuck this" and tell her I'm going to go play in the arcade. "Really?" She says. "After I change," I say, because I've chosen this black, sparkly dress to put on. This girl is walking by and asking if anyone will go to the bathroom with her. I say I will and go off, yelling back to the girl in blue, "I'm going to the bathroom!" In the middle of the lobby there is a flight of stairs that leads up to this deck and this guy up there yells down at me, "I thought something smelled" and I scream "Go finger yourself, dickwad!" All of a sudden from behind me is this woman's voice. I can't see her but I know she's a nun, and the group I'm with is part of some church with the name "Covenant" in it. She is lecturing me about misrepresenting the group and other stuff.
may 9
There are many points in this dream where everything turns into a cartoon world, then back to normal. I'm at school and go on a field trip to this factory. I am going with this woman, another girl, and a boy whose dad owns a bunch of companies on the water. We are driving past the lake and he sees all of this stuff goes on that proves his dad runs a crooked business. We get to this factory and we start talking to this lunch lady about how the company is doing badly. I have a bunch of tissues that I want to get rid of so I go into the bathroom with someone else and flush them down the toilet. The toilet starts to overflow and so we run out. The mens and womens bathrooms are connected and so I run out through the mens room. This soldier is just coming in and I salute him then keep running off. I'm at school walking around and I'm on the top of this spiral staircase. I keep going down partway but I see this guy sitting down that I don't want to run into. Then I figure out it's a security guard so I walk down into this cafeteria. There is another staircase leading up to a deck and I see this guy I know. I yell "Hi!" and he yells back "Hi, bro!" so I say "Hi, SIS." I see Mark so I run over, scream, and hug him. He's brought a pack of Saltine crackers for each of us to eat.
may 16
I'm in the backyard and we have a really big, built-in swimming pool. My mom and Rose are in there, plus some other people, and I get in. It changes to a big public pool, and there is a party going on. Mr. Bailey is a chaperone and people keep going up to talk to him. I'm walking around the party and someone says that Joyce had been trying to call but couldn't reach me. I get on the phone with some Polynesian girl who is also at the pool party. There is this girl walking around with her dog, and he keeps walking circles around me and I am trying to get away from him. A bunch of girls run up to Mr. Bailey and complain about this guy who is doing bad stuff. I end up right next to the Polynesian girl so we start talking in person instead of on the phones. I'm looking at my phone, trying to get the messages to come up to see if there is one from Joyce, but it won't work. The Polynesian girl and some other girl are all trying to look and the first one says "Come on, I have a phone like that, I can do it," but I won't let either of them see it. I'm a detective and go to investigate this murder with two other detectives. One, the man, had to be late so I went with just the women. The dead people were these parents and I think the mother might have killed the father. When we get there nothing has been touched and there is some music playing really loud. The bodies are on the top floor and we take this elevator up. I don't want to get in it because it's weird - you have to climb down into it - but I finally do. When we get near the top, the elevator ceiling is gone and the elevator is not quite to the level. This guy on the top floor is arguing with me about whether the elevator is going to crash. I'm at my grandma's house and we're having a dinner party. Cyndi Lauper is playing on a stereo and I'm dancing around the dining room. Everyone else is discussing some scandalous thing she supposedly did. I'm at someone's house and participating in this weird contest. This man and his wife are on the top floor, and they send something down, and when I press the water button on their fridge, I have to catch whatever liquid they put through in these little white dixie cups. I fill up a cup with water, one with either dark vinegar or soy sauce, and one with urine.
may 17
My family is having some weird party and everyone is playing volleyball, except we're all sitting on the ground in two groups facing each other, and there's not a net. From where I'm sitting I see this ghost so I start getting freaked out and I tell this guy sitting near me about it. He says "I'm sorry, that's really scary," or something to that effect and so he reaches out to hold my hand. The both of us are wearing those weird latex gloves like doctors do, so we take them off before holding hands. He gets tired of hand-holding so I finally let go of him. We're in the house and walking through the kitchen and I see that the refrigerator door won't close all the way. I tell my dad that he left it open and he doesn't care.
may 18
I'm in my bedroom getting ready for a class that starts at 7 PM. I'm trying all of these different outfits and I'm having a really difficult time deciding what to wear. I look at my clock and notice it's 7:18 or 7:19. I keep seeing this really big, ugly roach in my room and so I'm trying to take as much of my stuff off the floor as I can. My godmother picks me up and drives me to school. I go to the theater and the stuff for the play is still set up. I had some of the outfits with me and give them to this guy who is in charge of costumes. I'm at the bookstore with Gwen and a bunch of other people, just hanging out. Most of the other people don't like me. One of them is this girl who is going around stealing a lot. I left my purse on the ground in one aisle, and I see her trying to get into it. I take it and say, "Is there anything you need?" and she doesn't answer, just walks away. I'm walking around the campus, and there is some kind of weird spirit day, and a bunch of guys are dressed as girls. They're only supposed to do it for a certain time and when the time ends, and some of the guys are all dressed up, this guy who is supposed to be the vice principal comes along and tells them to go change. I'm at home and across the street there is a cute fluffy dog walking. Then this brown dog comes and they start fighting.
may 19
I'm in the kitchen talking to my mom and I have my cell phone with me. It rings and it's a text message from Maria. It's really weird and has this design of hearts and lines. It's a special program from some company and all of a sudden I get delivered all of these papers from them, like this big questionnaire. Rose and her mom come over because her mom just got off of work, and they have some baby with them. Kristine arrives at the same time, with some black cat I assume is her pet. When Katherine is on the porch, she picks up this snail that was trying to come into the house. My sister and I take the baby into our bedroom for awhile to play, but I leave and I think the baby is following me but she doesn't. I notice she's not around so I'm searching frantically through the room for her. It is really messy and I'm looking under big piles of paper and my bed and things. I'm looking in one of the drawers under my sister's bed and inside is this pillow with blood all over it. I don't find the baby. I take note that I'm dreaming because the video camera is still in my room. Behind my sister's bed, I also find a part of my pink scarf that she had cut off, and I ask her why. I'm in my parents room and they have their big old waterbed. I'm lying on top of it and I can see and hear people talking about us outside, like talking about neighborhoods and about us moving. This one guy is trying to peek through the curtain at me and I hide. I'm in my room, just having woken up, and I'm writing down a dream that I had, and my brother is going by and makes fun of me.
may 21
I'm at home in my bedroom, cutting and dyeing my hair. There is a guy who is sometimes there helping me and sometimes not. The scissors I'm using aren't sharp enough and I think I'm messing my hair up but I finally get it right. I put blond streaks in my hair and then turn them pink. Later I'm looking at myself in the bathroom mirror and my hair has changed so it's got red in it, and it's a lot more curly. I'm looking in the back of my closet and I find this baseball-style shirt, with red-orange sleeves and the other part of it is gray. On the front is a rendering of an italian charm bracelet. It's the Fourth of July and I go to Dana's house. We sit in this garage that looks like the one at my grandmothers house and eat pizza. Her mom asks me what I want to drink and I ask if she can get me a bottled water, and she asks if I want it plain or carbonated. I say plain and she is happy about that. While we're in there someone puts a Simon Stinger CD on the stereo and starts to play it. Later Dana and I are in some room (looks like my parents bedroom) and we're watching a movie (10 Things I Hate About You?). The music still playing and everyone else is dancing to it, I think the front yard, and I want to look but can't leave for some reason. Her dad comes in and turns the movie off because The Simpsons has just started. My mom is getting ready to go shopping and I'm thinking about going with her, when my sister comes and says she's going, and they're going to stop at all of the Goodwill stores between here and Brentwood. My brother is using the computer and he's looking at this website that lists the seven deadly sins. We start arguing about what they are. He says that "Would" and "Could" are two of the seven sins. So we get into this contest and each start to make a list. Both of us write "Seven Deadly Sins of the Catholic Church" on pieces of paper, and he writes it in really big, hollow letters but I write them small. I start to make a list but for some reason I start listing the Ten Commandments instead.
may 25
I get these two huge packets of papers in the mail. One is from PG&E and the other is from some other company, and they're both huge forms I need to fill out before I turn 21. I'm in my house and this guy from the SLA is there to kidnap me. There is also this guy who is being kidnapped. The SLA guy makes me sign this contract that I won't try to contact anyone in my family or he'll have them killed. I sign it and he goes into the kitchen so me and the other abductee are in the living room. I get on the computer and try to send an e-mail to someone but the internet connection won't work, and all of these weird windows pop up. The other guy being kidnapped says she's going to tell the guy, so I close them in a hurry. The two of us start fighting and all of a sudden he wants to have sex with me and I push him off. There is some girl following me around and watching me. I'm driving around Concord in this convertible, and I see a sign for some hotel that is either $45 or $75 per night.
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