He's just a plaything, we wanna make him stay up all night

So as promised, amusing things from an old issue of Family Circle magazine (September 1980):

- Ad for Wheat & Raisin Chex, which no longer exists. If the cereal looked anything like it did in the ad, it's no wonder. Now, I dig Chex (Corn only, though), and raisins, but together it just sounds and looks wrong. Give me Almond Delight any day.

- Ad for the Wear-Ever Kabob-It:





I really want one of these! This little thing cooks up shish kabobs apparently... mmm. I bet you these will make a comeback eventually - fondue did.

- Ad for new Pert shampoo and conditioner. I thought it was around earlier than the 80's, but there you go.

- An offer for a free pair of No Nonsense Panythose when you provide proof-of-purchase for Mop n Glo cleaner. Huh? Yeah, the first thing I want to do after mopping is spend my day hiking up pantyhose.

- Ad for Ayds appetite supressants. My mom said this stuff actually worked, and the chocolate bars tasted good, but they stopped making them because no one wanted to buy a product that reminded them of AIDS. I found an Ayds commercial on YouTube and an article about its being a business flop from Time Magazine.

- An ad for Secret deodorant, whose slogan back then was, "Comfort and strength women want." Way better than "Strong enough for a man, but pH balanced for a woman" which is the annoying, vaguely sexist one I remember from childhood.

- I didn't buy a current Family Circle for comparison, but I doubt they have as many cigarette ads as the 1980 edition: four 2-page ads, and six 1-page ads. And they all had the same warning:

"The Surgeon General has determined that cigarette smoking is dangerous to your health."

Can anyone say, "Duh!" I couldn't find out whether this was the only warning until more research was done (or should I say revealed) about the dangers of smoking. I would be truly shocked if it was the only one, as Congress passed the law about requiring warnings on cigarette packages in 1965, fifteen years before this magazine was published.

- An ad for Proctor & Gamble's Rely Tampons, removed from the market in the early 1980's (hey, this ad may have been one of its last) after its consistent link to toxic shock syndrome. The TSS scare in the early 80's killed at least seven women and affected hundreds more. You can read more about Rely Tampons and toxic shock here.

Fun taking a trip in the past, isn't it? I'd love to see the reactions of people in like 2030 going through stuff that's current right now. "An MP3 player? Look that clunky thing!"

Tomorrow night I'm to go see "Click" with LT and some other people. It'll be good to get out and see a mindless comedy. I've felt extremely bored and stuck in a rut - anything I could do to get out of my bedroom would probably be good.

Last night I had a dream that someone was testing me to make sure I knew the difference between their, there, and they're. Like, it was a matter of life-or-death that I had it down pat. Whew, at least I'm covered there.

This morning I nearly panicked when I went into the office to pick up my check, and didn't find it on my desk as I'd instructed the AP chick to do. Seriously, I wrote what I thought was a very clear, firm (but polite) note with explicit direcitons on where to leave it, right below my timesheet - but she had it set up to go out with today's outgoing mail. Sorry chica, but you just wasted 39-cents of company money because I ripped up that envelope getting to my check. What can I say, having eight dollars in your checking account because of someone else's error the week before will make you kinda sorta madly desperate.

Stay on the phone with me so I can hear you breathing

To (finally?) end my boring rants about dreams about telephone numbers: This morning I was scouring the classifieds as I have been on the job hunt, and staring right at me was one of the phone numbers I've dreamed about. Seriously. Only one number out of the whole thing was different. Ugh! One would think that'd be a big hint that I should call it, but it is a bit too far for me to travel to work. So there!

The new commercial with Snoop Dogg and Orbit gum amuses me. "And that's what it's like to be a gangsta," he tells this private school class, and a quick shot of the kids shows them all open-mouthed and probably terrified. He suddenly drops down the floor into hell, which I guess is only occupied by old ladies with horns. Somehow chewing Orbit gum sends him up into heaven, which is blue and white and populated by angels in skimpy white dresses. "Fabulous!" Says blond Orbit girl.

But the best part of the commercial: the disclaimer underneath that says, "Orbit gum will not actually get you into heaven." Damn, and I thought I'd found a loophole!

I was going through stuff on the site a couple days ago, and I have an awful lot of links that are dead and broken and such. In fact, the link I had to a Placebo site is now pointing to some quite unfriendly-looking porn. Um, I should probably fix that. Besides general updating, I think I'm actually going to be condensing some things, and getting rid of some others. The lists section is a dud, and I haven't added any new lyrics in months, so I may get rid of that also.

Last night I got sucked into watching this bad horror film on Sci-Fi called "The Ice Cream Man." It was made in 1995, which surprised me as the bad, cheap fashion and set design seemed to scream 80's. But anyway... some demented ice cream man (obviously) goes around killing people between his various flashbacks of life at the nuthouse ("There are no bad days here, only HAPPY HAPPY DAYS! What kind of day are YOU having Gregory?"). He does this with the permission, if not encouragment, of his former nuthouse nurse who lives in the trailer right across from him. Among his various ice cream concoctions: Replacing the marshmallow in rocky road with an eyeball (yech), and he at one point serves the token Slutty Neighborhood Mom a cone with her husband's head stuck on top. I had to crack up at that; it looked so stupid!

It's kind of gloomy and cool outside this morning, so I took the puppies for walks. I wish they were sociable enough to be able for us to take them to a dog park or something. It might work out with T-Bone, but never with Evil Pepe, and it would be mean to only take one of them. Poor babies. I'd say it's a pound puppy thing, but JH's dog is friendly and well-behaved (with people at least, which is half the battle), and Bo Charley was good with other dogs as long as they were only visiting and not staying in his backyard. Aw.

So besides the job hunt, I don't have too much going on this week. Tomorrow I have to take in my timesheet to get paid (me money want now) and I'll stop by to visit Miss J. And on Friday, when I finally have money, we'll do lunch. God, all I have been thinking about this past week is junk food. Luckily I haven't had the funds to go buy fried chicken, otherwise I'd be back in my fat(ter) jeans. There's not even too much junk around the house. Not necessarily health food either, though; if I don't want to starve, I basically have the choices of cereal, sandwiches, or quesadillas.

Now that there's about one week before writer's club, maybe I'll have enough motivation to, you know, write something. But probably not.

Yesterday my mom and I went through this really old (1980) "Family Circle" magazine. So many funny and odd things... it's weird to see product ads without web addresses. I made a bunch of notes and I'm going to have to blog about that when I'm out of ideas of my own. I promise, it's not going to be as boring as it sounds.

Preview: ALL of the cigarette ads have the EXACT same warning. Which one? You will have to tune in next entry to find out. Bwahaha!

I just wanted to make you, I never meant to break you

Okay, like three of my dreams in the past week have included phone numbers. Like two of them were supposedly my friend's telephone numbers but are really not, and the other just isn't in that it only has six numbers total. It's got the "Phone Police" episode of "Are You Afraid of the Dark?" in my head.

In that one, some kid (Billy?) and his friend were always pranking people, and the older horsey-looking sister tells Billy about some kid who got busted by the phone police for doing the same thing. She tells him his name, which Billy looks up in the phone book. Calling information to find out why it's only six numbers long, the operator tells him in a chilling tone, "That number is foreign and discontinued." Good old not-bright Billy calls it anyway, and switches places with the kid long ago locked up by the evil phone police. Bum bum bum!

Anyway... yeah, so if you didn't go to my dream page linked to above and read the one I had last night, I called the short number (606-606... that's fairly evil eh?) and a psychic told me that something terrible is going to happen. Ew. I'm certainly not calling any of the numbers I dreamed about, though I am curious. According to Dream Moods, to see a telephone number in your dreams means that you need to make contact with someone and reach out for help. Umm. Let's hope I don't need to do that for any reason.

And I know I'm the only one who cares about my dreams, but I had a snippet of one a few days ago where I was out in the hills with a group of people, and there was a herd of cows milling around. We were near train tracks, and could hear it coming, so started to shoo the cows away. Some of them would not move, and I screamed and ran away with my hands over my ears so I wouldn't hear the impact. Dream Moods sez:

Cows: Cows signify my obedience to authority without question, and my passivity; seeing the herd means that I feel the need to belong.

Trains: I'm comforming and going along with others; the train wreck signifies chaos, or I'm upset about not reaching my goals, or having low self-confidence that leads to my not reaching my goals.

So both cow and train apparently equals complete conformity, and I have low self esteem because I'm (supposedly) a conformist? Or that I'm upset that I'm not reaching my goals, and I think that the reason for not reaching them is because of my (supposed) conformity? Gah, my brain hurts... and you're all falling asleep. Wake up!

Today, I returned some movies to the video store (how long until we start calling them DVD stores?) and then went to see Ms. JH who was all alone at work. Aw. I hung around for a bit and went with her to the bank and to get food from Jack in the Box... yum. I love cheddar potato wedges forever.

When I got home, I had two packages waiting for me: one was a book (The Busy Woman's Home Spa... or something like that. It's actually pretty neat), and the other is my stuff from Avon. I stocked up on a couple of essentials* (the only mousse ever that makes my hair non-stupid, and toner), "Lip Dew" lip balm, tweezers, and a couple of things for my mum.

*I had wanted to buy a thing of my moisturizer, but it wasn't on the site. Um, you guys better have not stopped making that. You'll feel my "Fuck the brand loyalty, it's time to throw down" wrath like nobody's business. Hee hee.

And let's not forget the most important box of all - the idiot box!:

"Deadwood" - Last night's ep brought the return of Mr. Wu, who has not learned even one more word of English, but that's fine since Swearangen hasn't learned one more word of Chinese. How these two get anything done is a mystery, but there ya go. The same wagon also brought in Hearst's black cook, who has taken on Richardson as an apprentice, and somehow she knows enough Chinese to play Mah-johng (sp?) or some similar game with the Chinese in the camp. Away from her job, she is delightfully vulgar, and I hope they make her Calamity Jane's drinking partner.

"Entourage" - Domenick Lombardozzi ("The Wire", a few episodes of "Oz" before he became a pawn in a war over a cell phone) arrives as Dom, the ex-con "pal" of Vince and co. Only Vince doesn't seem to realize that no one else wants him around. Johnny Drama bristles when Dom takes over as a breakfast cook, Turtle doesn't want Dom to do his job (the driving), and E. thinks he's just a plain idiot (true). I think I'll enjoy this storyline a lot, seeing as it emphasizes what is the real theme of the show - not Hollywood, not fame, but just good old friends. Elsewhere, Ari (Jeremy Piven) freaks over his daughter's first boyfriend, a teen movie star with an attitude.

"The 4400" - USA apparently wants this season to be a sad one, with last night's episode having Maya kidnapped by weirdos who apparently created the 4400, and then erasing them from their lives. Diana and Cute Nerdy Dude left NTAC on a frantic search for her, but when Maya gets erased mid-transit, they only return to Diana's apartment with a pizza and video. Harsh. End titles say "To Be Continued", and let's all hope things are restored to what they were. Shawn feels conflicted over sleeping with "From 2 years old to 20 in 20 seconds" Isabelle, who gets encouraged by Matthew to encourage Shawn to hire her father as an advisor of sorts. Part of Matthew's plan is having Isabelle wear a skimpy, lacy, green bra and panties - which Isabelle later kicks his ass for. Finally.

Only boys that save their pennies make my rainy day

Friday, my dad made a smoked turkey that was very yum and so huge that I had some for each meal yesterday. Breakfast, it was a quesadilla with turkey and green chiles. Lunch, turkey sandwich. Dinner, tacquitos. Mmm, so much skin... I don't even want to think about what my arteries look like. Eh, what you gonna do.

Yesterday I went to the first day of San Francisco Pride. It was quite close and very easy to find from the BART station, which was good because me + directions = confusion. I went right for LS and her boy and we walked around looking at different stuff. There were some big companies that had booths there (Comcast, Kaiser, Virgin Megastore) as well as smaller groups. I was glad to see that the SFPD had a recruiting booth. Next year, I'm so going with money to buy more stuff. I so need a clever t-shirt, such as the one from DITC (DykesInTheCity) that says "No to bombs, yes to bombshells." That's so cute!

One booth that got a lot of attention was The Vagina Lady, an artist who creates, obviously, vaginas out of different fabrics and stuff. They were all beautiful and all different, and I wish I had the funds to buy one. (Looking around her website, I couldn't find a place to buy them there - but I could be missing it, it is 7:00 AM and I'm confused.) If nothing else, it would be a unique conversation piece.

I did buy one thing while I was there, which was... a purse! If you didn't see that coming, you must be new to this blog... very new... anyway, take a look:





I've seen a lot of this type of style of purse at Cost Plus World Market, and even Target, but just haven't found one that was "me." This one obviously is: pink and black (best color combo ever), silver sequins, and notice the tiny shells that dangle from the bottom. It's gorgeous, oui?

I was only at Pride for a bit over an hour, which I do regret now. I have issues with port-a-potties, but there was a Starbucks near enough by that I could have used - but I'm sure they would have been irked at me showing up throughout the day to use it without buying some of their la-dee-da (I had no money to buy said la-dee-da). Memo to self: Next year, don't be broke. And while the proximity and convenience of BART is great, and way safer than driving despite what my mom thinks, using it always zaps my energy. I have the half-hour plus drive from Brentwood to the station in Pittsburg, and from there to Civic Center it's over an hour ride. I was not cut out for any kind of travel, apparently.

I wish I had stayed until after 3:00 to see LS's cheer group do their thing. Before they left, they had a mini-show... and I mean mini. It wasn't an actual performance at all but a rehearsal of a more complicated part of a routine (there were like four different squads - San Francisco, San Diego, Los Angeles, and... OK, three squads) that took about a minute before it was over. I'm looking forward to see what they do in the parade this morning (T minus three hours), which I'll catch on good old KRON. God, they just better not have Darya Folsom there. How does such a twit of a woman become such a popular news anchor?

You know whose music freaks me out? Devo. It's, like, ominous or something.

Oh god, last night my mom and I watched the remake of "The Hills Have Eyes." If you haven't seen this already, my recommendation would be: Don't. I saw the original some years back and don't remember a lot of it, but I don't remember it being this terrible. Also, it had at least a few funny moments; this one is ugly from beginning-to-end. And we didn't even rent the unrated, not-seen-in-theaters version.

Yesterday, I also finished season two of "Nip/Tuck." I wish I hadn't known as much about the series as I already did, so I would have been surprised at various plotlines such as Ava Moore (Famke Janssen) having been born a man, or The Carver going after Sean, and then Christian in the finale. I even already know who the Carver is, so I'm not going to be shocked when it is revealed in season three - which I'm still looking forward to watching, anyway.

I am also looking forward to breakfast (hungry!) and a shower. They really need to invent a waerproof food so I can do both at once.

Blank page was all the rage, never meant to say anything

Damn, it's hella hot today. And I don't mean just outside, although it was up to 104 yesterday and will be the same (or hotter) today. It's also scorching over at Real Women Have Curves, where Karla has brought us "El Papi Chulo" list part 5. This edition includes notables Wentworth Miller* and the Italian men's soccer team. Mmm... check it out!

*I read that some magazine - either People or Us or other glossy crap - rated top Hollywood bachelors, and somehow that freaky gray-haired American Idol dude rated OVER Wentworth. WTF? First of all: Ew. Second of all: ...Ew!

Forced myself to work as much as I could this week because I knew my project was comign to an end... and it did! I went into the office this morning to pick up my check** and work for the weekend, and when I got home and checked my e-mail I found a note from my boss saying it's pretty much done. That's a relief.

**My check was NOT. THERE. What. the. HELL? (Like my use of periods*** there?) I turned it into my boss who turns it in to the lady who does AP but I guess something was lost in translation. I'm pissed. And, you know, broke.

***I realize I'm going to overdose on asterisks this post, but the word "periods" reminded me. Watching TV with my parents a few days ago, the Seasonale commercial came on. The first line is something like, "What to say 'so long' to a period that's too long?" And goes on to talk about how Seasonale can make it so you can have only four menstrual periods a year (I'm no fan of monthly inconvenience, but this just sounds wrong to me). Anyway, my dad says, "Oh... I was wondering how they could say a period at the end of a sentence could be too long." Ha!

I had an interview yesterday at a company over in Antioch. It was funny, my time was at 2:00 and I showed up about ten minutes early. The manager was gone but I was talking to one of the other employees while doing my application and such, and around 2:00 the guy who had the 2:30 interview showed. Now that's early. The office is really small so he went back outside while I finished up, which didn't take long. I think I'd like this job, though it would be weird at first being full-time again. It has been admittedly too long since I've had a 40 hours per week thing.

Coming home from the office this morning, I stopped by the 7/11 to see if they had any of the Terra chips I love. No deal. Ugh. But I was craving junk food and got a bag of Lay's chips and some of their tacquitos which I will devour for lunch, and probably regret later on. Ah well. I also got a strawberry daiquiri Sobe, which is not as good as I remember. (Yummy tip: they're good for making real strawberry daiquiris. I put ice, strawberries, a bit of powdered sugar, and this stuff in a blender.)

OH! I discovered the world's best snack yesterday. Dip apple slices in peanut butter (which is already delicious enough) and THEN dip in honey-roasted sunflower seeds. I'm sure the health factor of the apple is muchly reduced by the other stuff, but it's like fruity and sweet and crunchy and salty all at once.

In TV land:

- This week's episode of "Rescue Me", which started out great, ended on a very bad, disturbing note with Tommy (Denis Leary) sexually assaulting his almost-ex wife. Now, no one on this show was ever what you'd call moral, but I'm wondering if and how they could ever make Tommy remotely likeable again. FX has long deserved admiration for pushing the envelope, but they didn't have to go as far as tear it up and piss on it. Sheesh.

- I watched the first episode of HBO's new comedy "Lucky Louie" with Louis CK, who I've heard of but never knew any of his comedy. It was amusing enough - I probably won't become a hardcore viewer, but I'll probably tune in OnDemand episodes. I liked his refusal to get his TV-wife pregnant because they're broke. "Do you know how much money we have? Negative fifty dollars! And I'm going to need at least three thousand to get completely hard." Heh.

- BBC America is now airing "Waterloo Road" on Thursday nights, a drama revolving around the teachers and students of the (private? they wear uniforms anyway) high school Waterloo Road. (Actually, I'm not sure if the school is called Waterloo Road, or if it's on Waterloo Road, or what the hell's going on). Similar to "Boston Public" or "Degrassi", but it looks to be a pretty bad school.

We've got teacher Tom, who gets married to fellow teacher Lorna, while he's actually in love with also fellow teacher Izzie. Izzie's ex-husband is a real jerkass, and her kids - Ignored Brunette and snotty Chloe - are serious brats. Chloe dates Donte, who steals his thug father's limo to go on a drunken joyride that ends up killing his best friend Adam, leaving behind a rightfully pissed off twin sister (not, thankfully, named Eve). In the middle of it all is a new to Waterloo teacher Andrew, having left a job in a posh high school, whose persistent idealism often causes more problems than it creates. Principal Jack Rimmer is somehow wooed by Mrs. Haydow (I think that's her name - maybe not - and I'm not sure whether she's a teacher or administration), who comes onto and finally seduces him in the men's restroom of a fancy restaurant. Ahem. All in all, quality family fare!

I heard a rumour, they say you got a broken heart

Oh my god. "Epitafios" is finally* coming out on DVD on August 29! I'm so pre-ordering from Amazon this week.

*Okay, I personally haven't been waiting that long - since March or April, maybe. But YAY!

Saturday, I woke up at 7:30 with only four hours of sleep, but I actually wasn't that tired. I don't remember what I did that day, though. Yesterday - Father's Day - we mostly just relaxed around the house except for a quick visit to my grandparents. I got my dad the "Full Metal Jacket" DVD... it's one of the few movies he watches over and over that I can stand, though it freaks me out.

When we were visiting my grandparents they were watching the end of the movie "The Fury," one of the few horror movies I've missed. I saw like two minutes of it - totally gross! I won't spoil it for you. Okay, I will - this guy gets exploded by some freaky psychic girl, and it wasn't so much the actual explosion that was disgusting (even though it was), it was the fact that they had to show it from TWENTY DIFFERENT ANGLES. I mean, we get it! Heh, movies are dumb.

Today I went grocery shopping and I was going to get things to make stuffed bell peppers, but all of the bell peppers I found except for one were just ugh and squishy. It's June - shouldn't they be good by now? So I only got one that I'm going to use in orzo salad tonight along with zucchini, pineapple, and sunflower seeds. I usually use slivered almonds but couldn't find any today. I did find a devastatingly hot guy who works there. New crush! As if.

Mindful of this week's budget, I didn't get much else: a smallish bag of Kettle chips, a 99-cent notebook (it matches this folder I have, I had to!), one Odwalla citrus monster, a spinach salad, and a few Granny Smith apples (they're from New Zealand - I tell you, some of this produce has done way more world traveling than I have).

I don't know if my boss is back at work yet - I've had no e-mails or calls from him since last Tuesday or so. I have just enough stuff with me at home to finish off today here, but I'll go in tomorrow.

I had a dream Saturday night about a former teacher of mine. He was over visiting us for whatever reason (we were living in my grandmother's old house) and I went into a bedroom to change my socks because the ones I had on (see-through orange?) were ugly. He wandered into the room awhile later (not following me) and lay down on the bed. The bed was a queen-sized, I think, and had no footboard or headboard. I got on the bed next to him and he didn't want me to (well, he didn't not want me to - he didn't say it but I had the feeling he was worried about my dad coming in. I wasn't because in the dream my dad had hurt his back and he wasn't going to be walking around - and my dad really did hurt his back IRL last week but anyway), but I told him I just wanted to be next to him, which was true. The dream just ended with the two of us lying there, and I felt very happy and cozy and safe. Aw. Gag.

I did catch the second half of the third-season premiere of "The 4400" that I'd fallen asleep through. I actually didn't miss too much of it, but I missed one major thing in Lily dying. But I liked her! Couldn't they kill off creepy "Mr. W from Deadwood" whatever-his-name-on-this-show-is? He totally wants to do... uh, Lily's daughter whose name I forget, who transformed from 2 years old to 20 in like ten seconds. Perv. The episode last night was really great. There was a 4400 returnee who could pass himself off as anyone and there was all this confusion and like whoa. (That's a damn fine literary example of a TV review right there: "It was like whoa.")

I'm also sort of watching "Windfall," which is about a group of 20 friends and various people who win the lottery. Luke Perry has somehow ended up playing the only well-adjusted guy on the show, but maybe he won't be so chipper when he figures out his wife is crushing on Cameron, this big-headed college professor who serial cheats on his wife and is probably the father of one of his student's babies.

Elsewhere, Shady Blonde Lawyer is hooking up with Shady Unshaven Latino Dude, and Annoying Lady is claiming the money "won" by the cute Pizza Delivery Girl belongs to her. Also, Young Guy is totally clueless to the crush Another Winner's Daughter has on him, but I guess he is distracted by the Skanky Russian Chick he had to marry to get emancipated and claim his winnings. Or something. Enjoyable trash, I tell you.

She's got the answers, she doesn't have to question herself like I do

It's 2:50 AM, and I am blogging. Why?

Tonight, went to the Cache Creek casino with LS and JH. It was pretty neat. It is hella big. And though I am somewhat notorious for being the only Hernandez who doesn't dig on Mexican food, we ate at this one place that had a divine chili verde. Mmm. And my blue margarita was pretty neat.

I did more gambling than I thought I would, with a loss of $30. D'oh. That's not even a big of a screwing as I got at the ATM, where there was a $3 dollar surcharge. Jeez. Ha, I loved how the menu popped up with its first few options for withdrawals being $300, $200 or $100.

I got home around 1:30 and was going to go to sleep, but just don't feel tired. Of course I'll pay for this tomorrow when I'm dead tired and crabby like no one's business. Eh, what you gonna do. I thought I was only going to be online for a few minutes to check out a friend's MySpace profile, but here I am over an hour later. Oh god, I got a message from this guy who does great run-on sentences, and said "blah blah you're cute wanna be your friend" (in a message) and also sent me a formal friend request... and in checking out his profile, I straight CRACKED UP. His main photo is of himself with his kid, and he mentions the kid in his profile, but under the whatever-you-call it statistics section he says "I don't want kids." You're a little late on that, dude.

When driving down my block I got hit with a story idea (thank you, Muse) that I was going to work on, but it's scary. And three AM is scary enough for me already thank you. I don't know if I mentioned that in this blog or my Myspace dealy, but I hate being awake during the time between like 2:00 and 4:00, but the 3:00 hour is the worst. I'm not sure what the reason of that is.

Another complication: I am super thirsty and now also hungry. And there ain't nothing to grub on. I finished some yum leftover pizza for lunch, and had my Lunchable for dinner (I will always heart Lunchables, I don't care how much of a kid it makes me look like to have one). So barring the very remote possibility that someone cooked something fantastic when I was gone, I'm pretty much out of luck.

Speaking of kid stuff, "Hey Arnold!" is on... I still love the early episodes of this cartoon. My favorite is where they go on the field trip to the opera and Helga imagines herself as Carmen, but called Carmhelga. Brilliant!

This morning I was in-and-out of work to pick up my check before anyone else showed up. Hey, that's how work should always be! I wanted to get home fairly early to take the doggies for their walks. I've been wearing this certain pink tank top when I go, to try to even out the tan on my arms (I think it is actually workig - slowly, but working) and now whenever they see me wear it, they know it's walk time and go crazy.

I wish I had as much confidence in myself as the people in my writer's club have for me. They like my new story a lot, but I hope I can actually pull it all together to make sense. We'll see, we'll see. I have been neglecting my writing too much lately - what I should do is force myself to write something (preferably on haunted house story) for this coming week's morning meeting.

Well, Pepe is getting angry at me for keeping the light on and keeping him awake, so I guess I will go to bed after all - but not before completing the original point of this post. In my last entry I mentioned Liev Schreiber and Naomi Watts, and promised a list of sorts. I considered various titles for the list, one of them being "Celebrity Couples I Want to Have a Threesome With"; but decided finally that this would be:

1. Inappropriate (apparently not so inappropriate that I censored myself)
2. Embarrassing (apparently not so embarrassing that I didn't tell you about it)
3. Not true (apparently not so not-true that I thought of that title in the first place)





So you can catch Liev and Naomi, among others, at my totally wholesome and innocent list of my Favorite Celebrity Couples.

Once more the sound of crying is number one across the earth

Gosh, more than a week since my last post? Sorry about that - I really didn't realize. It's been harder for me to come up with stuff since I've got my MySpace blog, which actually makes no sense since it's mostly quizzes/surveys I post over there. But anyway.

I'm heading into my third week on my current project at work, and I think my brain is slowly exploding. Listen. Type. Fix. Repeat. And while working at home is almost always more comfortable, I've had a hell of a time with it at this project. And you know what it is? My desk chair. I always thought I had enough "natural cushion" (ie fat ass) to not need any on the chair, but jeez this thing is killing me. Now I've got two light-but-soft blankets all folded up to sit on. Even with those, more than one straight hour in the chair leaves me all sore and ugh.

Last Wednesday, I went with BA - KA's friend she wanted to set me up with - to see "The Omen." I wouldn't call it a date, but it was pretty fun. He seems like a nice guy. I actually truly, really loved the movie. It's set in modern times, but it's not hella stupid and they stay true to the original. I want to marry Liev Schreiber super-bad, but I think he's either engaged or married already. But his girl is Naomi Watts, so I'm cool with that (you know all celebrity couples need my approval, duh). Actually that reminds me of a post I need to make - but shouldn't - but will anyway, later this week.

I went to Target on Saturday morning for no particular reason, and hit the argyle jackpot. Three notebooks (two regular, one composition), and four pairs of socks. Love. Ooh, and I had more sock love (yeah that sounds bad huh) on Friday as I stopped by Burlington to buy yet another pair of the elusive pink-and-purple striped socks I have to buy every couple months. They had only one pair! I also scored fruit and drink flavored lip balms. Mmm...

Well, we have a lot of TV bits today. Take notes, you'll be tested.

"Nip/Tuck" - I'm 2/3 of the way through the second season, and my only wish is that I'd been in on this show since the beginning. My main reason for avoiding it was surgery scenes (which thankfully, not unlike morgue scenes on "Six Feet Under", have become - usually - less frequent and gross). I started in on this believing it would be nothing more than enjoyable trash, but this actually is - and I really do mean this - a wholesome show. Sure, there's drug lords and porn stars and oh so many sex partners, but somehow at the end of the episode it's about a family - the McNamaras (Dylan Walsh, Joely Richardson & kids) and Christian Troy (Julian McMahon), who is a part of the family not only emotionally, but as it turns out biologically.

"Deadwood" - We had to wait way too long for the return of Calamity Jane, I tell you. She said so many great things last night but I laughed so hard that I promptly forgot them afterward. Bullock (Timothy Olyphant) finally does what we (or at least I) have been looking forward to for two years, which is beating the crap out of EB Farnum. Heh, "The sheriff is kiling the mayor!" Joanie plays a round of Russian roulette, which I really wish she wouldn't because she's my favorite prostitute on the show - after the delightfully profane Trixie, of course.

"Entourage" - Is it wrong that I want to marry every guy on this show?

"Dane Cook's Tourgasm" - Dane Cook is very deservedly the comedian of the moment, and this show will be a lot of fun. I like not only the obvious bits of comedy but seeing the relationships between the four comedians on tour together.

"The 4400" - Why did they have to make the premiere two hours? Because I totally missed the last half!

"Rescue Me" - I'm still scratching my head trying to figure out how this show can be both hilarious and incredibly sad. Kenny's "innocently" dropping his cigar from his mouth when walking by Tommy's (Denis Leary's) truck was so funny I almost fell off the couch, and then a Gavin family birthday party exploded into violence - pretty much all directed at Johnny (Dean Winters). Tommy, I get that he's screwing your (ex?) wife, but I will take only so much thrashing of Mr. Winters, even if it's in the script.

And tonight, we get the second season of "Hell's Kitchen." I think shows where they pit men vs. women are pretty lame, but to me it's all worth it for Gordon Ramsay's delightful meanness (he so outdoes Simon Cowell), and for French maitre-d' JP (Jean Phillipe - and if he's not there - neither am I!)

People love you, but I know you

"Heathers" is on right now. I knew it would be. This morning after showering I was randomly thinking about it, and every time I do, it comes on. Great movie for so many reasons. Sometimes I feel so much like Veronica (Winona Ryder) that it scares me. Especially when she says, "Now I use my grand IQ to decide what color lip gloss to wear in the morning and how to hit three keggers before curfew." So me, except for the keggers, but god do I waste my brain on crap. But on the plus side, I don't have a bunch of vapid bitches for friends, or a boyfriend who blows shit up.

Heh, KA is trying to set me up with one of her friends. I must say I find it... odd. I'm not the kind of girl guys want to get set up with. All we (the guy) and I have done is send each other a couple of messages. It's not a high pressure thing. If I made as much of a simple friend out of it that would be great as far as I'm concerned.

Work this week was pretty good. I got to work from home Friday (yesterday) but didn't sleep in, just because I got used to waking up at 6:00 during the week. Grr. I went by Mervyn's to pay my bill and made myself run the hell out before shopping. Good thing I did, as I've already spent more this week than I intended, and consequently my budget for the Bath and Body Works semi-annual sale on Monday is reduced. That's the last time I fill up my gas tank before a big event like that. Fifty bucks! Why can't I be one of the lucky fools that end up at a station where gas is mistakenly sold for like, a quarter a gallon?

In spite of over spenderage I went to Payless this morning - it is BOGO (buy one, get one half off). Luckily (?) they had nothing cute in my size. OK, I get that not many women have feet as big as I do*, but why do we gotta get all orthopedic, granny-looking shoes?

*I wear an eleven - actually 10.5, but saying 10.5 sounds as if I'm trying to make my feet smaller. So, yeah, eleven. Now I don't like the look of feet (especially mine) in any case, but why did I have to also get stuck with big ones? Supermodels my height (5'9") and taller don't end up with them (or do they?) Damn heredity...

Writer's club Thursday went all right though I'm dissatisfied with the beginning of the story I'm working on. Well, writing crap never stopped me before - I shall press on.

My blogs have been very superficial lately, but it's not all air up in my head - I am actually thinking about things, but feel too confused or uncomfortable to discuss most of them here. Hell, let's rip the band-aid off a little bit.

Work: It's getting progressively frustrating to not be able to find a job I like, and also to keep getting passed over for the ones I do apply for. My temp thing at OTH is working all right - mostly - but I have to move on. If nothing else, I need a permanent job where taxes are taken out, because I don't want the IRS stalking me next spring. Plus, I'm tired of feeling like a massive fuck-up. I've never been fired - every job I've had, I've quit, for various reasons. My thoughts here contradict each other: One one side of the brain I'm all, "Hey, why should I stick with something I hate?" Other side of the brain says, "It ain't called work because you're supposed to like it, dumbass."

Family: I couldn't pinpoint exactly what it is - it's all the little things about your family that drive you crazy, and right now mine often is. Part of this is undoubtedly that I'm 23 and feel more than emotionally (as opposed to financially, which is really the one that counts) ready to be on my own. Just when I think I'm going to start getting along with my brother (ditto sister), we have some big, stupid argument that prompts my mother into complaining about said argument. And my dad has become more annoyingly vocal about my odd status of quasi-employment. Yeah, I get it.

Friends: Love my friends, but they're mostly inaccessible. I miss EC more and more - we never had to think of anything to do, the way I have to make plans with the others. We could just kick it and have fun doing whatever it was we ending up doing, which was usually nothing. I need to make more friends - not only close friends but even just people I can randomly have fun with.

Soul: No clue what's going on here. I've had spiritual crises before but nothing like this, which is me questioning whether I believe in god. I always did before even when I was pissed at him - so what in the hell (heh) is my problem? I want faith - I don't need a church** or a leader or a book, just simple faith - but is this something you can get? Do you just have to have it? Did I truly have it before, and if so how did I lose it?

**Though, I've been meaning to go to a church in the area I've done some research on. It's liberal outlook is nicely in line with my non-spiritual beliefs, but you can't really hang out at a church without god. But yeah, it seems as if every time I want to go something comes up.

Mental Health: This probably encompasses all the above-mentioned things. I need a therapist, life coach, behaviorist, or something. But that needs money or insurance, neither of which I have. Hmm. Shame, because I found some info on a lady who sounds like a great match.

Which reminds me of something that is more light-hearted, and I'll leave you with. Researching therapists and all, it occured to me that I want a woman doctor - which is funny because as it comes to medical (body) doctors I prefer men. (This is something I mention in my post "I'm a sexist pig" which is in my Best Of 2005 section, I think.) I entrust my body to dudes but my brains to chicks - there must be something Freudian in that.

Do websites have DNA?

If they did, I think they would look like this:





Each colored dot represents something different - links, HTML files, image files, and so on. Unfortunately I don't have the key, but you can learn more and get the webgraph for your own website on this page. Thanks also to Neat-o-rama for providing the link.

Yeah, I don't want to do a real entry right now. Just wanted to share the blueprint (or whatever) of the site.

Yay Friday Things:
- New ep of "Degrassi"
- DVD's from Hollywood Video (new "When a Stranger Calls", "Stay", and discs 1 and 2 of season two of "Nip/Tuck"
- Twix bars!
- I had a rum & Dr. Pepper earlier, it was very yum.